Creating a FAMILY Blueprint of WE Document
By Maureen K. McCarthy and Zelle Nelson,
Creators of the Blueprint fo We Our kids created their first Blueprint of WE Document when they were four and six-years-old. It’s possible to include children in a family Document at a very early age. It enables them to learn to mediate their own stresses, rather than relying on Mom and Dad to settle their disputes. There are millions of brilliant adults who have spent their lives struggling with their relationships. When kids learn from an early age that they need to hear their own internal voice, pay attention to who they are, and then exchange that information with others, they begin to do the more effortless dance of relationship from the start.
When we don’t teach children to listen to what’s inside and act from that place, we create victim mentality; one situation after another where we are victims of other people. When I consciously build my relationships with other people, and pay attention to what’s working and what I might want to alter, I cannot be a victim of others or the circumstances around me.
Creating a family Blueprint of WE Document also gives equal voice to every member of the family. It creates space for the conversations that matter and draws us together, not out of obligation, but out of a desire to deeply connect with the people we are most involved with.
As the life of a family naturally evolves, it’s members grow and change. With this growth and change comes the need to alter the relationship container to fit the people involved. This is a great time to create a Blueprint of WE Document in a family, or to update your Document in this time of growth. We’ve seen parents create Blueprint of WE Documents with their adult children, or when their kids leave for college. As new interactions and new roles emerge, each person is asked to re-define their relationship. By being clear about how they want to be with each other, the process of transition is smooth and effortless. The Blueprint of WE Document is also great for specific situations unique in the life of a family. They have been created among all family members in conjunction with hospice care to make this last transition as smooth as possible for the person leaving. It is a brilliant tool for the remaining family members as the family changes and they take on new roles.